Plunking in NYC

New Decade, New To-Do

2010-01-05T06:58:00.000-08:00

As they come to mind....

1) Investigate CRC/Calvin-connected shows

2) Video at AAC w/ RZ + Strings - put on Youtube

3) Raise financial support for CD of RZ + Strings

4) Texas tour

5) Musical

6) Ars Nova Show/Reading of Musical

7) Advice column

8) Memoir

9) Small-Town Tour

Big Bucket O' News

2008-04-17T12:47:00.000-07:00

So, hi,

I've been a pure deliquent in the ol' bloggersphere these days. Last entry October 2007? Today is April 17 2008? FAIL. Nice try. Everyone can see you are a punk face.

Okay, self-verbal-lashing, check... now for the goods. It was over 1 1/2 years ago that I had my first meeting with PD. He gave me some good advice; pointed me in a good direction. At his guiding I paid better attention to my vocals and improved upon them. I listened to live recordings and made notes on the things I could do better. I built up my relationship with the Sidewalk and got myself a residency there. Baby steps, yeah.

Now since October, some more stepping stones:
-In two sessions, one in October and a follow-up in January, recorded 8 songs in a simple but excellently miced and recorded piano-vocal demo (thank you DB, TD, and AAC!)
-Have been introduced through PD to several industry movers and shakers, who have subsequently been introduced by PD to my rough mixes from aforementioned recording sessions
-Am getting professionally mixed and mastered said recordings and releasing them publicy as an EP as well as using them for an industry demo.
-Continue to play about one gig per month and have as of November started getting booked at The Living Room on a semi-regular basis.
-Continue to write new songs/keep the variety
-Have temporarily revamped rachelzylstra.com and am using a new webhost so that when a full redesign is logistically/financially feasible, it will ALSO be easily uploadable.

So that's it for now; I hope to have more to say in another month or less. On the move!

To Do Before Month End (Accountability Partner, thanks...)

2007-10-18T10:07:00.000-07:00

1) Find your BMI account #

2) Register all songs from Most of It Is True

3) Contact the company that NC put you in touch with re: Film/TV placement

4) Pick/polish songs for October 26th recording

5) Send email re: October 30th show

6) File 2006 taxes

7) Send belated gift for CJZ

8) Make a poster for October 30th

9) Catch up on giving

10) Book Thanksgiving & Christmas travel

11) Bring tape from October 26th to PD for feedback

12) Make & duplicate "September Shows" incentive CD for distribution at Oct 30th show

13) Upload pics from September show #1

14) Make MJZ mix

mending the gaps

2007-04-27T06:43:00.000-07:00

Yow!

An expression of delight, surprise, and a healthy dose of sassy. I'm feeling it right now.

This past week was what I considered, going into it, the biggest week of my musical career thus far. Now that the milestones have passed and I am coasting into the weekend, I sense that I was perhaps building it up a little too much in my anticipation. The two events that made it so "monumental" were as follows:

~On Tuesday, a concert at Geneva College in Beaver Falls, PA, at which I was the opening act for Dave Bazan and for Over the Rhine. I took two days off my day job and drove a total of 13 hours to do it.

~On Thursday, the opening show for my four-month residency at the Sidewalk Cafe in the East Village in NYC. For this residency, I invested in hiring stellar graphic designers and printing 1,000 promotional postcards that look like this:

Okay, so now that all this hulabaloo has passed, I'm thinking to myself, that was nice. My life isn't really different than it was three days ago. Certainly, besides the adventures in themselves, the lasting values of these experiences are:

-some new fans in western PA
-the "resume builder" (aka music bio builder) of having opened for a couple of national acts
-a couple new fans in NYC
-the "what works, what doesn't" and "learn, tweak, and relaunch" aspects to a starting show in a series of shows.

Regarding disappointment: I confess I was minorly dismayed that more people did not turn out for the Sidewalk gig. I was really thankful for the friends and acquaintances who came and supported; at this point however I am itching not to have to rely on loyal friends to fill seats (which makes it sound like I'm eschewing loyal friends, which is absurd and untrue, but hopefully you get my gist). I would love to be able to draw a roomful of strangers (that sounds so sketchy). I am encouraged though that audience turnout IS something that can be improved upon via a new, or perhaps just heavier, promotional approach. So, just putting this in my backpocket for the next show (May 31!).

Alright, but here's the pleasant realization: after coming home last night, I popped in the CD recording of the show and gave it a listen. The recording sounds good! Since getting the comment in September that I could benefit from some voice lessons, I have been working on the ol' voice. Though I never got lessons (I pursued one potential teacher - it feel through), I have been listening to a lot of recordings of performances since then, hearing the "bad habits" and the different qualities that my voice has and deciding which ones I want to bring out most often. Mostly since, I'm just working on keeping my vocals consistent, controlled, properly supported. And I do believe they has improved. It helps of course, having those beautiful strings winding in and out of songs... (Burning Down Rome definitely did their part last night).

There is a little more news - more than a little, but better to watch my head about it and keep it little in my heart. :) PD and I had another meeting a couple weeks ago, after he had listened to the recording of a live performance from February. He told me, "You are ready to go; all you need is a really good demo." He proceeded to tell me/show me the webiste of a friend of his with whom we may be able to work to get a simple 5-song demo recorded, and he advised me to pick and practice 5 of my best songs. I do not know the timeline on this, just that there seemed more of a sense of immediacy to this meeting and to this assignment than there was to our initial meeting in September. So this is incredibly encouraging to me, as I look down the track at the next several hurdles. I'm still running...

Thoughts/Intentions for 2007

2007-01-09T20:31:00.000-08:00

Alrighty, so it's been a while; time for an update.

Good things are happening. This Friday I leave for a weeklong trip to Washington State where I will play two shows on two consecutive weekends. When I get back I will be rehearsing with Burning Down Rome for my next NYC show which is in early February. Since late November I have gotten into a habit of booking a couple shows per month (vs. the usual one show every one or two months), to positive result. I think it's important for me to keep up this new frequency because it's motivating me, keeping my skills sharp, and getting me out on the scene even when I don't always "feel" like it.

On the recording front: I'm still a total novice when it comes to my crummy-yet-nice home recording equipment, but despite the frustration and my tech-tarded ways, I aim to make recording a bigger priority and use these resources more often. This year I would like to make great recordings of six songs I don't currently have available for public consumption, enough for a nice EP. I think this is a conservative goal. But the reason for making these records will not be to release them but rather to run them by PD (See "The Conversation" post) and hopefully recruit him to help me record with awesome people that he knows, who actually know what they are doing in the studio and aren't just knocking things around blindfolded like I do.

Notes to Self

2006-09-24T20:20:00.000-07:00

1) You emailed The Store on Thursday or Friday about a gig Ocotber 11 in Chicago.

2) You need to confirm with Ken the 13th

3) Check in with JP re: western PA coffeehouse gig

4) Drop off CD at The Sidewalk Cafe tomorrow

5) You emailed Rockwood tonight about a residency - way to go

6) You are 4 months behind on your new year's goal to complete one song per month

7) You emailed JL regarding voice lessons - follow up this week

8) Tend to your email list and CDBaby list

9) Email links and a gig bid to the nice girl at Think Coffee - but you want BDR on board with that, don't you?

10) Columbus possibilities... have you any other ideas?

The Conversation

2006-09-10T19:05:00.000-07:00

All right, so Friday was a big day in music. At night, the show was a success. Jason played a great set, I played; I got to sing harmonies on his "Lion Song" and "Carolina," which was just peachy. A good crowd turned out, and at the end of the evening, filed out pleased. Yes, it was a venue in which "filing out" was the default manner of exiting.

Hours earlier, Friday afternoon brought its own small triumph. A conversation commenced in an unassuming office, twenty-some stories above the canyon of Times square, launched by the meeting of an earnest young, demo-wielding artist with a well-connected, well-versed music industry executive. He asked me if I wanted to know specific things from him or if he should just spew things as they came to mind. I told him to please spew.

I'm going to try to capture the gist here. The gist is, he thinks I can go places. He's willing to help. He had some good solid critical advice for me regarding my vocal performance, and regarding playing out. Some of his connections are with people who have been or are currently involved in the careers of my favorite piano-singer-songwriters (RW. BF.) We were talking on a loose timeline. We talked about concrete details. Before I left he set me to task with a couple "assignments" while he meanwhile was going to talk to a couple of his connections on my behalf. He asked me if I wanted to make a living doing this, and then he told me that I can.

What makes me more hopeful and simultaneously calm about this situation, compared to situations in the past where I had a record label contact and wished upon a star that it would lead to somewhere, is the closeness, the accountability, the familiarity. This is my very own connection. I see this gentleman on a daily basis. We're already acquainted. He and my own boss work closely together on several projects. I'm friends with his assistant. He passes by my desk a dozen times a day by default. That is to say, he is under no obligation to invest anything in me, and yet now that he is expressing that he will, it is particularly significant that we do interact daily, because inherent in that is a measure of accountability, for both of us! "Following up" in the past meant me bothering a friend of a friend for the fourth time to find out what Mr. X thought of my demo, or waiting for a phone call from Mr G. about whether he thinks I have a future in music. Following up in this case means, walking down the hallway, knocking on his door, and sitting down for another chat -- once I have finished my assignments, that is.

So we'll see.

Baby steps, baby

2006-09-05T15:06:00.000-07:00

On Thursday I have a 30-minute meeting with an MTV exec/former record label exec to discuss my CD which he has listened to.

On Friday I play a double-bill show with one of my fave singer-songwriters, Jason Harrod.

Hey! That's not too bad!

Preparing for the Bitter End

2006-06-04T21:30:00.000-07:00

With a big gig coming up in now just under two weeks, I am forced by necessity to stop sniffling (both physically and figuratively), drink a glass of water, take a deep breath, and sit down ready to roll. (and rock.)

I am setting aside "indie musician's discouragement" for now, and focussing instead on being in the right place at the right time, doing the right thing, and even, perhaps, helping to facilitate that intersection of rightnesses.

"How are you going to do that?" Well. It began with the creation of an event. First I negotiated the booking at the Bitter End, dealing also for the band Burning Down Rome, that they would open for me. With a little promo kit and a couple of conversations, consecutive time totalling 90 minutes was secured for us. That was nearly two months ago: a Where and When, done.
Through rehearsals both individual and collective, we are honing the What. BDR are going to back me up instrumentally on three songs, and perhaps do some vocals on another. They've got a great set in the works - I know their material is strong, having seen them play recently. On my own I am culling the current strongest songs from the ol' repetoire, going with the most pleasing, most requested (of late) stuff.

Who? Hopefully you will be there (or at least in spirit). An Evite will go out to over 200 people. Included will be everyone on my email list, plus people from my workplace who have asked to be informed about the next big gig - plus perhaps, some exceutives at my workplace whom I will have either "snuck" onto the announcement or attemptedly charmingly asked, when I see them during the day, if they would be interested in seeing a mild-mannered executive assistant reveal her rocking-er side. hm. so we'll see about that, too.

How? Well, I believe that's been explained now. In addition to the practicing and the Evites and the not-so-covert attempts to bring in VIPs with mad music industry connections, BDR and I will get a few joint publicity pictures taken this week, by the lovely and talented BG. And I think that does it... for now.

May drudge

2006-05-17T06:58:00.000-07:00

So, it has been quite some time since I last wrote... if I had big news, I'd have shared it... but in reality music is just slow going, like molasses. I don't even like molasses.

I still have not booked a single college gig for my big fall tour. Certainly, I've been trying... more recently I have been trying to book gigs in the locales where I have weddings to attend this summer: Orange City, IA, and Atlanta, GA. (I know, random combo.) That isn't yielding much either --- but I haven't given up yet. I'm finding, though, that you can't just point at a place on a map and then go to a database that lists all the easy-to-get-booked-at-coffeehouses-that-also-have-pianos. Such a database does not exist. But really, I don't need a sound system. I'll take someone's living room.

Where is a divine plan in this? I'm not questioning God's involvement but I am questioning my own motives. I'm tired of feeling desperate.

Good Soul Medicine; Or, An Elixir for the Spirit

2006-04-21T09:42:00.000-07:00

The weekend... I can't remember the last time I anticipated a weekend with this much excitement. Strangely, it is not a stressful week that has put me in this frame of mind; it's a unmotivated, uneventful one. I feel like I'm stuck in a rut and I need to be refreshed. So JP and I were describing a weekend in such an instance as being the above.

College tour booking is SO SLOW. Nothing booked yet. Granted, there are perhaps two leads I need to follow up on now... but it's discouraging for instance, to send out an entire press kit to a school that personally requested your material, only to receive zero response from them. I'm starting to think about other avenues, other regions besides the midwest to which to market... like, hellooo, the pacific northwest perhaps? Could combine doing a few gigs with visiting a newly born niece or nephew, in say November. ahhh, that would be so awesome. Okay, so now I need to find that motivation and work ethic that I lost under the couch or somewhere.

On the bright side, I have two nice gigs coming up, one in May at the Waltz-Astoria and one in June at good old Bitter End. Prep and promotion for these is certainly more than enough to keep me busy, but if I let college booking slide there will be even less change of making it happen once the gigs have past.

FYI, I posted Neah Bay on myspace. Speaking of the pacific northwest...

Happy weekend to all! Love, Sep10ber

Update. Illuminated with links.

2006-04-14T10:49:00.000-07:00

1) Make follow-up calls to colleges (this week) ---sorta; have connected with two schools so far
2) Send JH my CD (this week) ---done
3) Follow up with the BE (this week or next) ---yes!
4) Write two new songs ---two songs half-written, yes!
5) Secure a gig with BDR at either BE or LR --- Bitter End 6/17, wsg Burning Down Rome!
6) Book the first fall tour gig ---...
7) Go to open mic at the W-A ---meeting with the owner tonight
8) Investigate Hostbaby ---...

Inspiration

2006-04-09T16:32:00.000-07:00

Something I never would have guessed or imagined: a little Over the Rhine and Sufjan Stevens music sprinkled liberally into a Palm Sunday service makes for an awesome experience.

April To-Do List

2006-04-03T09:51:00.000-07:00

1) Make follow-up calls to colleges (this week)

2) Send JH my CD (this week)

3) Follow up with the BE (this week or next)

4) Write two new songs

5) Secure a gig with BDR at either BE or LR

6) Book the first fall tour gig

7) Go to open mic at the W-A

8) Investigate Hostbaby

"Speaking of Regret"... I have no chorus yet

2006-03-13T19:51:00.000-08:00

Above in quotes: the title of an unfinished song. Had I been sufficiently on task, the song would have been completed by the end of February. Now it's March and I have two songs to write before the first of April comes to pass (am I in Rivendell? wha?). In fact, I am blogging right now in part to procrastinate on finishing the song currently known as "Speaking of Regret," which has a misleading title; I think I will have to change it.

I also write in part to report that the excellent Matt V came over to my house tonight to help me figure out my recording stuff. Even with all his expertise we were not able to get the Cubase program to do everything it says it can do. Rather, we discovered how to do most everything on the software he took with him. Huh, so much for that. But he is going to do a little research and come back to help me again. In the meantime, I CAN RECORD!!! Seems I cannot do piano and vocal together - at this point - but can record the tracks separately. Double hooray.

And finally, speaking of the OPPOSITE of regret... good collaborative gigs are in the works. I won't say anything more than that, just that I look forward to the opportunities it appears I may have in the next several months to share the stage with some quality, quality artists.

Recording was never my strong suit

2006-03-09T19:39:00.000-08:00

Alright, so the latest is that I sent out a mass email to musician friends in New York seeing if anyone knows anyone who could give me lessons on how to use all the expensive junk I just bought. I'm in good spirits, despite not getting any sound out of my keyboard yet, when it is plugged into the interface. Hopefully I will be logging sound engineering lessons very soon.

Sound engineering is something I've never been excited about, especially when I spent four months studying it (along with songwriting, and performing) in a program on Martha's Vineyard during college. I really, really do not understand it, and only by necessity am I struggling to. I wish someone made a program that was like using a Fisher Price tape recorder, except digitized. Instead, I look at the Cubase screen and am overwhelmed by all the pull-out tabs, clickable buttons, pop-up tool bars, and dozens upon dozens of EQ and reverb options. Give me Record, Stop, Play, Fast Forward, and Rewind. Give me a "Reverb or No Reverb?" button. I'm good to go with that. That's all I want.

Karl wants to know the brands of the stuff I got. I'm a little hesitant to share this info because buying it was a big step and now I'm stuck with it. I dread hearing something like, "Oh, man, you got (X) brand of interface?? Daaaang... you should have bought (Y), which is the professional standard, much easier to use, and costs half as much on (insert discount electronics store URL here)." So just bear with me. Help me think positive. :) That said, here's the line-up:

Omega Desktop Recording Studio including:

Steinberg Cubase LE multi-track recording software
Lexicon Omega interface - 8 Input x 4 Bus (what's a Bus again?) x 2 Output USB I/O Mixer
Lexicon Pantheon world class VST reverb plug-in

ATH-M40fs Audio-Technica studio headphones

GT55 Groove Tube condenser microphone

ProLine boom microphone stand

Raxxess pop filter

Monster 12-foot 1/4" cables (two)

Mogami microphone cable

The end.

Home Recording Studio

2006-03-07T13:18:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, after several tedious, wary visits to the only Guitar Center in town (with "town" being NYC, "only" does seem a bit unreal), I plunked down a good sum of money and a minor piece of my spirit in exchange for

a condenser mic
an interface
recording software
various cables
a boom mic stand
crazy fancy headphones

which, all together, in conjunction with my trusty Yamaha keyboard and silly Dell laptop, constitute "Rachel's home recording studio." Last night I got so far as installing the software without causing my system to crash, and with sticking cables into the right holes - nevermind actually getting to test the sound. Yeah, yeah, I'm not using proper terminology... let it be common knowledge that I have, truly, about one slim children's "I-Can-Read" volume above Zero Knowledge of the science of sound recording...
unlike friends of mine, who are (I say this admirably) walking encyclopedias on the subject. And, sadly, live too far away from me for me to recruit to help with my new pet project.

Let the fumbling around with quarterinch cables begin! I'm a real indy now.

I FINALLY SENT A COLLEGE MAILING

2006-03-03T06:50:00.000-08:00

Well, big news item #1 reads above. After months of talk, I started to walk in the form of 17 hand-addressed promotional flyers to various midwestern schools, aiming for fall show dates.
Sent: This Morning.

Ironically, I also just took a salaried position at the company I've been temping at for the last year. It interesting how motivating this has been for my music pursuits. Now I have the addition of financial stability (and health insurance) in my life. I can afford to by recording equipment, and maybe even pay someone to rehaul my website. The catch is that I can no longer take time off (unpaid time, but time nevertheless) whenever I want. I have ten days of vacation time. TEN DAYS. Paid vacation - sure, that's great!! But will my bosses allow me to take unpaid days from time to time, if needed? How does that work when you're no longer paid by the hour?

And if anyone is concerned for me that I've abandoned my mild, God-fearing version of a bohemian lifestyle for the coporate fast track - fear not. First, to be sure, it's not fast. Second, I haven't embraced it, nor will I. Taking a 9-5er was as much about music goals as it is about stability. Some of you know that the corporation where I work may also provide me with some musical boosts, in the form of friendships with co-workers and special employee events. heh. Just call me a future Fergie of the Black-Eyed Peas. No, no, please don't. Just kidding.

February and beyond

2006-02-22T14:42:00.000-08:00

Okay, it's been a while... time for an update!

New for 2006 (a revamped agenda):

1) Furnish myself with a basic home recording setup (Feb/March)

2) Send out publicity/booking materials to colleges (March) aiming for a 1-2 week tour (Sep/October)

3) As per my 2006 "new year's resolutions," write one new song per month. I'm on well on my way - I wrote a new one in January inspired by a town I met in my Pacific-Northwestern travels last August. This month's song, only just begun... but the inspiration is coming right along.

4) Submit to TAXI! Start soon!

5) Schedule a show with "Burn[ing] Down Rome" for late spring

It seems like there was more. Stay tuned.

TAXI

2006-01-26T11:03:00.000-08:00

I joined TAXI today, '"the world's largest A & R company."

Gig tonight - I'm a little stuffed up ('nother cold), but at least I got the Neah Bay song finished.

Minorly Less Unmotivated!

2006-01-23T11:33:00.000-08:00

Thanks to those of you who posted encouragement after my last entry. I did indeed send out the kits I needed to - and by kit I mean, CDs with business cards attached. Well, it's better than nothing!... ah, hyeh. (imagine minnesotan accent just there.)

I've got a gig this week and my focus lies with 2) finishing my newest song (inspired by a rainy place) b) polishing a Ben Folds cover c) possibly writing a new song in the next two days, also to be performed at the show. Next month I'm playing in GR, which will be a nice, how you say, *homecoming*, perhaps? moo-ha-ha. Man, I'm losing the formal edge here. But I have to be honest. I'm still no closer to a college tour than I was a month ago. At least I know what I need to do, and am being held electronically accountable by the four people who read this. Thanks, guys.

No-Mo

2006-01-18T21:06:00.000-08:00

...tivation. I haven't written in a while and it's not that I'm oh-so-busy, it's more that I am having a lot of trouble getting around to simple music-related tasks. It feels to me lately like studying for a test that my final grade depends on. I know I need to do it. I know I'll feel better when I do and it will help me reach my goals. But I'm finding I would rather clean my room first than assemble a press kit and send it off in the mail. Argh! Okay, I am going to go assemble a press kit now. Finally.

Looking for Inspiration... at MOMA, Kudo Beans, and so forth

2005-12-16T21:37:00.000-08:00

I feel like I would like to complete one more good song before 2005 comes to a close. I have completed a song recently that I am pleased with, but I wrote the first two thirds of it three years ago, so it hardly counts as "new." Tonight I went searching for some creative inspiration at the MOMA, followed by a little solitary coffee-house session which involved me nursing a decaf with two pens in two hands, writing verbatim the sentences to come out of other coffeehouse patrons' mouths, until finally I mustered something somewhat orginal in the form of two poem/prose pieces. Okay, so they aren't songs. They could use some vocabularic tweaking. But it's better than nothing:

God Thoughts at the MOMA

The painting makes me feel like God may not exist.
Why is it, that inside a man-made structure, murmuring over brushstrokes, I doubt,
But standing outside in the sunshine, I can't not believe?
Does God's kingdom seep into and overcome even those dark interiors that I see rendered in abstract on the inky canvases before me,
Or are there truly places on this earth - locales physical and metaphysical - that God forsakes?
How then would he be Love?
Does Love leave a rebel to her own blind prison?

New Yorkers

What does God think of 5th Avenue?
The same window displays that launch a thousand eating disorders
Send me a wistful wave of longing for beauty that seemingly transcends life in gravity.
The perfectly sculpted mannequins dressed in jewels and the most exquisite skirts
Are the copper Athenas of this time and place,
Where we've atrophied, jaded and sophisticated beyond all reason.

John Lennon Songwriting Contest

2005-12-14T19:34:00.000-08:00

A few years ago, in 2000 and then in 2002, I entered the John Lennon Songwriting Contest. Five years ago the $30-per-song entry fee was a big deal to me, but so was the contest, and I submitted four songs... at the time it felt like putting $120 into investment bonds. Two years later, it felt like playing the lottery. This year, having put musical eggs into other baskets, it feels more like buying vitamins. Can't always tell, really, if it's making a difference, the money I'm spending, the capsules I'm consuming, and it's not like I'm not taking caring of my health in other ways. But it seems it can't hurt at all, and it might just be really productive in the long run.
I went with two from Most of It Is True: "Lost" in the pop category and "Living in Fantasy" in the folk category.

John Lennon's life ended tragically 25 years ago. I was three months and one day old the day he was killed.

Gathering my thoughts.

2005-12-13T12:55:00.000-08:00

I returned to Caffe Vivaldi open mic last night after taking leave of it for a year. Met with a friend, a new transplant to NY trying to break into the music scene. I feel like I've learned a lot since being in her shoes at this time last year. Since the last time I was at Vivaldi.

The evening showcased a cool variety of talent. Besides my friend Katie Arnold, who has this great Cranberries-Irish lilt thing going with her pop guitar sound, there was a classically trained vocalist who raised the roof, and, very interestingly, a trio of guys playing together a cello, a viola, and a guitar, and singing along, and doing a lot of crazy counterpoint. (Whoever was playing the guitar for a song would also be the singer on that song). It was the ensemble's DEBUT performance; they have only been together for a month or so, and they're just trying this thing out. But I was immediately impressed, and the wheels started turning... it would be awesome to collaborate with them for a show, and awesome to have them play with me on some of my songs.
They called themselves "Burn Down Rome." I snagged an email address afterward.

More later.

To Catch Up - a poem

2005-12-08T18:37:00.001-08:00

These days we have much to discuss
We could pull our saucered coffee beverages off the counter
to be balanced precariously in our laps as we’d kick back on an old hipster sofa and trade our stories and our latest hopes and fears.

Of course, it would be snowing outside.

There are the little matters of latest movie actor fascinations
and the things with which we have to deal in our places of work and study
And the larger matters of you being married, and me living in 12 square feet in the city of my dreams.

The smaller bond that we both name cats not just our friends, but roommates,
and the larger bond that we’re both on a path to glorify, to the same end, and it’s hard not to get easily, absurdly sidetracked, every hour.

But I wish we would have this afternoon, this conversation I now imagine,

Because I remember the many that we used to know, when our hopes and fears were other matters entirely,

and beautifully intertwined.

Augh!! Setback

2005-11-29T08:24:00.000-08:00

My dear SB has removed herself from publicity/booking detail. It's nothing personal; her schedule just can't withstand what time and work this is going to involve. There are too many other commitments, and she has to prioritize. I totally understand, but Bummer!

Well, leading up to our clarifying conversation last night, there were problems. Nothing overt - simply the fact that it was taking us two weeks and longer to find times to get together and complete what would seem to be a simple next step, the college flyers. I couldn't proceed without her, and her time was at a premium, being nibbled by many other commitments. I sort of lost motivation during that time - not worrying myself too much about our delayed timeline, but then, not getting anything accomplished, either.

Now that it's been determined that she has to focus elsewhere and I am flying solo again, I feel some freedom. It's not like I'm not used to being a lone ranger in this department. Having SB was a major bonus, but it's not like I'm unable to return to TOTAL INDIE MODE. (Now would be an appropriate time for me to have the "What am I Doing Feeling," yet it is strangely, mercifully absent.) She helped me set a path; now I just have to keep going in that direction. Okay then. Over and out.

That "What Am I Doing" Feeling

2005-11-21T14:37:00.000-08:00

Every once in a while, say, once every couple months, I get really overwhelmed thinking about the music pursuit. My breathing gets shallower my stomach starts to churn. I find myself wanting to groan aloud as though this might relieve the psychological angst. My mind races over all the pieces to the puzzle - a website, getting press, booking gigs, pitching to radio, writing new songs, recording and how expensive it is to record, whisperings of how I should assemble a band, registering my songs with BMI and trying to get them out to those big-wig folks who pick music for movie soundtracks... and so on. There is SO MUCH to THINK ABOUT!!! Achieving my goals seems nearly impossible when I attempt to process everything in these weak moments.

Slow Going, College Booking

2005-11-18T11:42:00.000-08:00

I met with SB yesterday who was recovering from strep thoat, just as I was getting over a cold. Things have been delayed, due to these pesky illnesses and schedules... and misinformation. Yes, regardless of the obstacles presented by a busy New York autumn that has finally seen its first cold front, SB and I would have been behind schedule on the spring tour plan anyway, for not having discovered the best way to go about booking until it's probably too late.

We were going to send press kits to a bahundred schools, include the cd, follow up with calls, and hope for the best. Then we stumbled upon a smart article by Derek Sivers about the best way to book college gigs. He emphatically states that fancy press kits, unsolicited, will not catch people's eyes as much as a simple one-page flyer will (perhaps sent about three or four times before it finally compells them to call for more information, or to request a CD). Persistent - but not annoying - repetition is key. He also says that colleges typically do spring booking in the fall, and fall booking in the spring. It's already November 18. My chances for booking a February or March tour may have slipped through my fingers even 6 weeks ago. But I'm not discouraged. The flyer method is a real money-saver, and it's worth a shot, even if I don't drum up a tour-sized number of gigs until NEXT fall. In the meantime, it would be good experience for me to play even a few isolated college shows in the next half a year. If that's all that came of this first round of promo, I would be really pleased.

"I'm a-looking and I'm a-likin'..."

2005-11-11T13:18:00.000-08:00

The title has nothing to do with today's content. It is a phrase uttered to prime hilarity by Ben Stiller's character in "Meet the Fockers," when he makes a drunken public statement about his future mother-in-law (and her "hotness"). During the time I visited my brother and sister-in-law in August, my brother started this thing of making that lewd comment about various things in various and often inappropriate settings. I.E. We're at Dairy Queen looking at the menu: "I'm a-lookin' and I'm a-likin'..." At the botanical gardens in front of a Japanese tree: "I'm a-lookin' and I'm a-likin'..." Surveying the view from a mountain vista: "I'm a-lookin'..." and so on. I love the absurdity of sexualizing a DQ Blizzard or a mountain view. It's ridiculous, though if you ever see print ads or commercials for things like desserts and margarine, it's not so uncommon...

As for today's content: I had a show two nights ago that was a pleasing event. It was a great space - quite small, bar in back, corner stage, big enough to hold the grand piano, which of course, was all I needed plus some. I played songs I don't usually play - some that even debuted publicly that night, including Oust, (recently completed, inspired by my all-time muse - some of you know who that is), Hurting Anyway (written summer 2000), and Untitled (inspired by my dad, and I'm having trouble titling it). I also played Spinster, which hadn't yet seen a New York stage. Now I'm all giddy on these new or reacquainted songs and it makes me want to record again. Unfortunately (or fortunately) that is not a financial priority right now.

Anyway, if you're ever thinking about buying a panflute, please consult this.

Most of It Is True at CDBABY.com

2005-10-27T21:51:00.000-07:00

The page is up! Order the new CD right here:

http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/zylstra

...And in the process be seduced by the recordings of trillions upons dozens (or so it feels) of other unknown, talented musicians who are just trying to get heard. If only Ashlee Simpson would grant a few of us each some small fraction from her ill-gotten wealth, with which we could take little bits of time off from our day jobs in order to fully invest our time and energies into creating excellent music. But I digress, right? Rock on.

Spring. Midwest. Tour. 2006.

2005-10-26T16:57:00.000-07:00

All right!!

I may be jumping the gun a bit with my enthusiasm, but I have some serious plans for this tour thing. It starts now. My best tool, besides having the CD, is a list of Student Activities directors at nearly 3000 colleges across the country, and all of their contact info. I paid a pretty penny for this list at CDBaby.net, but I already feel like it was worth it.

I have no timeline yet; just a list of things to be done, in sequential order.

#1. Pick the schools I want to target- where do I feel I have the chance and the means to play? My criteria include:

that the school be in WI, MN, IA, IL, IN, MI, OH, PA, or NY;
that it has a good working piano and sounds system;
that, if lacking a piano, it at least has a good sound system into which I can plug my keyboard; that it is in a town where I could stay with a friend, family member or acquaintance.

#2. Make calls to the contacts at the desired schools to give them the heads up for an impending mailing and try to "talk up" the music/the performance that I could offer. (SB would be great help here)

#3. Assemble and send out press kits containing the following:

-a copy of the CD
-the bio/press release
-a quote/press page, with quotes that not only tell what I do but how I do it, and how it would be a good act for a college crowd
-a great cover letter, tailored to each individual receiving the kit.

#4. Make second round of calls to the contacts to see that they received the press kits and if they have any questions - try to get them to offer some possible gig dates. Get booked!

#5. Try to get booked for dates that make sense logistically/geographically.

#6. Once gigs are in place, confirm lodging and car rental/borrow.

#7. Send publicity posters/launch mini-publicity campaigns leading up to each show (a subject unto itself).

#8. Rock and roll.

Okay, so my list deteriorated into the abstract there near the end, but one thing at a time. Obviously, there is a lot of work to be done.

over and out

Even MTV can't ruin my mood

2005-10-24T12:22:00.000-07:00

'Tis time for a new font, folks... I had to make a decision this past weekend, whether or not to plan a concert in Grand Rapids with a friend and his band for early December. It would have been very classy, very cool, very affordable, pressworthy... for various reasons, though, the plan was not coming together... and finally I had to abandon the idea. Mostly, it was going to be a costly weekend and even breaking even financially looked like a long shot. I realize that with the CD out, this is the time to be focussing on getting on the radar in some other regions.

Looking back on Big Day

2005-10-21T17:13:00.000-07:00

Some reflections on the CD release show, which happened on Saturday night.

Great/good things:

1) A huge crowd. There were over 100 people in the room and 62 people took home CDs.

2) Great energy; people were really enjoying themselves.

3) There was a really nice Calvin turnout! That was good for the heart.

4) I was privileged to be backed by special guests Sarah B. doing harmony vocals and Kyle W. doing guitar, with both switching off on percussion duty.

5) A bonus, which I did not discover until a few days after the show: thanks to SB's dilligent efforts, my gig got into the Village Voice with a little blurb! Editor Chuck Eddy did a wee little write up which showed that he had actually listened to the CD and looked over the press kit. Rockin.' Read it here.

Things I would change or be on guard for in the future:

1) There was a constant buzz of talking during the show, and I tried to compensate by oversinging. Consequently, the hard fast songs were solid - piano-wise as well - but my singing on the ballads was really incongruous, because I was forcing it/overintensifying it. You can't do that, especially on a ballad. It's just not right.

2) Part of the reason for the constant buzz of talking was I went on a half hour late, so the act that came after me already had their crowd there. Gals on keyboards can sometimes find it difficult to grab the crowd, half of which is there ready to rock out to the band that comes after them. And, I confess, gals on keyboards can sometimes make good background music. This girl isn't usually one for the background ;) - but I've licked my minor wounds. Being there at all - getting to play to a lively, people-filled room - was a great gift. DON'T GET ME STARTED! Don't even get me started.

3) In the week or two leading up to the show, I'd have done a visual/flyer type of promotion in addition to all the email promo - which, granted, was very successful. The new CD has cool cover art and I haven't made use of it outside of that. Where did all the time go, leading up to this thing? There are so many areas to cover. Something for next time.

It's exciting though, to look back on the experience, see what worked, what was lacking, and reconfigure things for the next go. Up next on the docket: possibly a Grand Rapids gig in early December. Stay tuned!

Where To Buy "Most of It Is True" - the new album

2005-10-13T11:39:00.000-07:00

Well, I was going to log in to the blog today and go off on a mild rant about how stressed out and sleep deprived I feel this week, but then I encountered the comments of friends wanting to know when and where they can buy the new CD. Now I need to resurrect the kindly-while-entrepreneurial piece of myself and subvert the faithless whiner. Why? Because this Saturday is coming, I've been preparing for it for months, and it's important to enjoy it and maximize the experience. No room for crippling nervousness (or excuses)!

Most of It is True - the title of my first full-length album - which releases officially on Saturday, will be available by the middle of next week both at Schuler's Books and Music on 28th St. in Grand Rapids, and online at CDBaby.com. I'll post again when it is literally on the shelves.

Gig-in-a-box

2005-10-10T15:03:00.000-07:00

The CD release is in less than a week. This past week SB was gone on vacation and my industriousness deflated a bit during that time. Now and she is back, and we aim to get the disc out to a half dozen college-operated radio stations tonight or first thing tomorrow. I also need to send initial stock of the disc to CDBaby and to Schuler's.

Still, an Evite we sent out a week ago today is yielding some satisfying results. It's nice to get an *idea* of the number of people planning to show, however rough. So far, 16 people have RSVPed Yes, another 5 Maybe, while 49 have said No. I expected a lot of Nos because of people living in different states. But by that ratio, - if more than one out of every four people invited comes - that's still puts the Evited audience at 40-50 people.

But another exciting development: I was contacted by an old acquaintance from college, who also lives in NYC and had somehow gotten wind of my show. He's trying to organize a local Calvin alumni gathering and wondered if I would be interested in having my gig be just such an event. Well, sure!

I haven't heard back from Paste Music yet. Though it's a little disappointing, I've learned by this point not to take these things personally. It doesn't mean that my CD sucks and that they couldn't bring themselves to tell me, though it could easily mean that 1) they did listen, and it wasn't so phenomenal to them that they came rushing to my voicemail or 2) they did listen, and had a positive response, but more pressing issues have been taking priority over contacting me or 3) they did receive it, haven't listened to it, may never listen to it, but certainly are not going to bother with contacting me until/unless they do. Really, these are all acceptable possbilities. I'll just keep plugging away.

Pasting Together the Publicity Push

2005-09-22T14:13:00.000-07:00

Good news! The go-ahead has been given, though not without having been given a slim timeframe for consideration. No problem! Following some quick legwork yesterday, we put together a kit with a spankin' new press release and overnighted it to Paste along with, of course, an advance copy of the album.

Other lines out:
-an outstanding request to Schuler Books and Music in Grand Rapids to carry the CD
-the green light to send the album to NYC-based, Fordham U-operated radio station, WFUV, for airplay consideration
-an as-yet unfinished registration with CDBaby.com, whom I intend to manage the online sales.

We will be tweaking the press release this weekend with intent to send out an armada of press kits early next week, but it felt good to get on our feet for the Paste Kit and turn it around in a day.

September ROCKS!

2005-09-20T02:58:00.000-07:00

Hey, so the order came in, and I have 1000 CDs sitting in my bedroom right now, awaiting some serious distribution... phase 2 begins. (I'm not sure when Phase 1 began, though I think it did contain several subphases.)

Publicity goes into full gear now. There is no moving ahead without spreading the word. SB is helping me out, working on a one-page sassy press release that is going to have some great elaborate metaphor weaving all the way through it. I, meanwhile, am compiling my contact list and throwing it in a semi-organized fashion onto a label templates document for an impending mass mailing. This afternoon I emailed Nick Purdy at Paste Magazine with hopes that he will remember me from the music festival we both attended in April. I gave him my five-song EP then; would he be willing to have my full-length disc reviewed if it met Paste standards? That's what I asked; answer to come.

August and Everything After

2005-08-23T14:11:00.000-07:00

Okay, I ripped off the title...

The CD package is in Discmakers' able hands now. The credit card number has been handed over. I am about to be much poorer - bring it on, yeah!...

While I wait for my CD to become multiplied, I certainly have much to keep me busy. Booking a CD release party has proven more difficult than expected. I may have to push it back to October in order to get the venue I want, which is booked straight through September weekends. (I inquired about playing there only two weeks ago - my fault for procrastinating.)

This week I am finalizing and rehearsing a new song for public debut this coming Sunday. I will get to have a talented band back me up. If you are in the area and interested in hearing, come to 1st Baptist Church at Broadway and W. 79th Street at 7 PM, August 28. That is, a worship service in New York City. The message of the evening: "Theological Reflections on Bling."

September 10 I will be playing a set at a street fair, on e. 74th near 1st Ave, 12:30-1:15.

I always feel good when gigs are on the books. The next step would be getting this party scheduled, and then making a publicity push. Friend/advisor SB can't be as actively involved in publicity as first discussed, so I need to cook up the key ingredients first and then run them by her for SB-ification. The crummy thing about doing one's own publicity: even if you're good, trying to tell people that you're good is never as positively effective as having someone else do it for you. Oh well.

PS. Vacation on WA's rural and stunning Olympic Penninsula with the family (minus two) was nourishing to the soul. Lake Crescent. Hurricane Ridge. The beach at LaPush. Murphy the Pomeranian. (He might make it into a song someday.) It took me a couple days to settle back into the urban daily routine, but at least I have stones from the ocean, already polished.

An Album for Various Sets of Ears

2005-07-20T12:41:00.000-07:00

Currently listening to: Upcoming CD...

Trying to finalize a song order. I had thought the order was set, and that we were ready to go, but then my publicist/advisor/fellow dreamer-schemer SB told me that the first song should not be first. From a business standpoint - for the ears of people with lots of connections and resources and very little free time - I needed something more ear-catching, so that in 15 seconds of listening I might make an impression that would gain me another 15 seconds, and so on.

I had not been thinking of the CD from that perspective. Here I thought, by releasing this album, I was going the indie route once and for all. But I suppose, when it all comes down, to get an agent, a manager, a record deal, or any combination of these things, would be desirable, if through these avenues I didn't have to think all the time about the business aspect of music and was given the freedom and resources to go to town on the creative aspects. yay! Wouldn't that be cool.

Anyway, after some individual listening and discussion, I think we are VERY close to the final song order. It's like putting together a puzzle that can be assembled many different ways - perhaps two of which are optimally appealing and satisfying. I don't know how I feel about that puzzle illustration just now. Speaking of unsatisfying...

In other news, the cover has been finalized. Ooo, I can't wait. I won't describe it because it's good to keep some things a surprise. Thanks to those friends who helped me make the decision. Joe is working on the rest of the package design now, and I'll get to review it next week.

I still need to figure out what I will do for a photo, where I'll get it taken, or if I'll even have one. I have some nice publicity photos from a year back and also a few months ago. It's a shame I didn't really do much with them. At the times of those shoots I didn't have a specific purpose in mind besides this gnawing anxious knowledge that "Publicity" is just something you need to succeed, and pictures are a step towards that. They are a record as well - I mean, I guess at least I will never forget what I looked like in July of 2004.

Now I have a collection of songs and a CD cover that evokes a certain mood, and the photo should match the mood.

July Jewels

2005-07-12T15:15:00.000-07:00

Excited to report that I got back the first round of CD cover "comps" from designer extraordinaire, Joe. Ten choices - they're all beautiful. I'm blown away by the quality and the depth of the designs. I'm trying to decide between two of them, for which he used similar design techniques... yet they each give off a different vibe. Just need to sit with them for a few more days, and hopefully it will become clear which one is best for the album.

Will be receiving a mastering "sampler" from Tom via mail tomorrow or Thursday. Things continue to come together, though it is mid-July now and probably time to start thinking about a cd release party, and booking some surrounding gigs. The business of daily life sometimes gets in the way... as it should... but I have the time, still, to be looking and planning ahead. I think I'll go do some of that look-and-plan sort of thing right now.

PS. Went out to lunch yesterday with two old friends from a songwriting program I attended at Martha's Vineyard, while I was still in college... we had a lovely time. Brent with his wife Ruth, and Courtney. Great, quality people... glad to have shared that experience with them, and enjoy seeing them succeed now in their respective ventures and lives.

Under the cubicle and bored

2005-06-28T17:27:00.000-07:00

All right, so perhaps boredom isn't the ideal impetus at which to post a new entry... but that's like arguing semantics. sort of.

1) I did decide to take the trip to Washington in August. Writing it out helped me to decide that to not go would be lame.

2) Progress on Summer Goals: The CD is underway. I have finalized the list and order of songs to go on it. The "master" is on its way via snail mail to the terrific gentleman who will be mastering it. His work can be viewed/heard here (www.tommcgrath.com) How did I find Tom? I emailed the worship/arts director (also named Tom) at the church I have been attending (which is enormous) and asked him if he knew any leads on people who did mastering well and for a reasonable fee. He gave me Tom's contact info, and I went from there.

Last night I had an initial meeting with another terrific gentleman who will be helping me with CD packaging design. I met Joe at the birthday party of a mutual acquaintance. He designs CD covers for Universal Records - hence his experience and talent are paramount to the aesthetic of this project! I am very excited for these collaborations.

I have not yet decided to go with Discmakers or a smaller printing company. We'll see what works out financially. I will be a lot poorer by the end of ths summer. ah, but the financial ache will hurt so good. Why? Because I'm finally doing what I've dreamed of doing, releasing an album in a batch of 1000 rather than burning a few copies here and there of a collection of songs that I call an album. I may even have to forage for an indie record company name. Anyone have any ideas?

Vacation Dilemma; "Making a Good Master"

2005-06-17T10:52:00.000-07:00

>things hopping on both coasts, simultaneously... if only I could divide myself in two<...

Tackling my musical goals, I have set the month of August as an arbitrary deadline for many of them. Why? 'Tis the end of that productive, historically "laid-back," "flow-of-things-is-different" season, Summer. It seems starting in September, the "flow" meanders, ambles, then strains uphill again.
I have the opportunity to vacation with my family in Washington State for a whole week during this critical month. I have no gigs booked - yet. No new album - yet. The question is, do I go on vacation, or do I stay home based on what activities (gigging, promoting) I could potentially be doing here in the city from August 13-20? Or do I give up a very real chance to see close family that I get to see once or twice a year, to be available to mere possibility? Will I get antsy spending a week with my family, antsy to practice and prepare musically, things I will not get to do, pianoless, in a cottage on the Pacific coast? Will I be distressed hanging out in my home city that week, if I don't go, thinking about the good times I am missing out on?

Thankfully, one real gig that I would otherwise miss if I went, I have managed to get rescheduled to a later date. Now I'm thinking that I SHOULD go. I want to go! But I want to be alert, remain on task, stay sharp on my skills, as well. And if I go through with the plan as mapped, gigs WILL be booked in that month that I'll need to be prepared for as soon as I get back. Oh, but I may just be able to handle that...

>I never think much about the art of sound mastering until I learn how much I'll pay for it<...

The person who masters my CD will have his work cut out for him. Honestly, it could probably use some mixing, still, too. The songs on the album will have been compiled from over half a dozen different settings, both live and studio. I've been told I could spend thousands of dollars paying someone with legendarily sharp ears to master my CD. I hope to spend about eighty.

Summer Goals

2005-06-13T14:46:00.000-07:00

Yes! it is summer. I can tell because:
1) my room feels like a rickety apartment built over an outer ring of hell - not quite torture
2) skirts and sandals I forgot I owned are suddenly appearing on my person for days at a stretch
3) every sunday I feel a nearly biological urge to flock to Central Park's Great Meadow at the sun's highest hours

Besides that, music plans are in the works, and what more motivating season than this in which to follow through? This season no longer means three months off of school. But leftover from that experience that constituted 16 years of my life, there is this sense of possibility, a sense of freedom, and the (perhaps unfounded) idea that, because it is summer, people will generally be cutting other people more slack than usual, and things will be more laid back. I'm attempting to take that extra slack and spin it into music-biz gold. With the help of a new co-conspirator and PR extraordinare, SB, I compiled a docket of goals. Here's what's on it:

1) Compile recordings for a "best of.. so far" album. It will include songs from my past three releases, plus a few never-before released. Have mass-produced through a cd manufacturing company. Hold a CD release party in August, location TBD.

2) Submit entries to the John Lennon Songwriting Contest and the Independent Musician World Series. I've entered each of these in years past and gotten honorable mentions or semi-finalist status. third time's a charm.. we'll see!

3) Book a concentration of gigs in August and Septmember, surrounding the release of the album.

4) Have SB do a push of publicity for the new cd and the gigs.

5) Contact college activites coordinators in first efforts to book a college tour for (ideally) spring of 2006.

That's the latest. These three months will be over in a flash. What will I be able to say I've accomplished by the end of them?

Bitter End Recap and the Introduction of New

2005-04-27T16:25:00.000-07:00

It is has been way too long since I posted something here.

In the interim...

I made an additional trip to my hometown Grand Rapids, April 1 and 2, to attend the Festival of Faith and Music as a workshop presenter, and hang out with (read: intimidatedly hover around) the likes of fellow musicians and presenters Sufjan Stevens, Daniel Smith aka Brother Danielson of the Danielson Familie, and David Bazan of Pedro the Lion, to name a few. Did I actually introduce myself to these guys? Well, not so much. They hung out in a clique like the cool guys in choir class. But the back story is, I was still feeling inadequate from an incident at the festival two years prior, when Daniel Smith had made me feel kind of dumb for asking him a question about his music. Ouch. Wounded pride or not, he's still great at what he does, in all of its glorious avant-garde weirdness.

In more encouraging news, I just played my first solo show at the Bitter End. Leading up to it I sent out three publicity emails, and distributed a great poster designed for me by Danny Palmer. (To see that poster, for as long as the link is up, click here). The gig went really well. It was truly delightful. Great audience, very attentive, and I felt like I gave them the best that I have.

I plan to be better about this blog deal. Just one of my new resolutions...

True Dilligence Part 2

2005-03-16T10:44:00.000-08:00

Gonna mix it up here with a new color and different font. Ahh, that's the stuff. Georgia in blue, don't fail me now.
All that stuff I said in January - ditto to that. It's funny how little distractions in one's life can very quickly become all-consuming situations to be dealt with. That is what happened to me this past January and February (yes, and I know, half of March has past, too). The situation to which I refer got a couple new songs written about it, so despite a lot of crappy heartache and frustration, all was not lost.
On Sunday I returned from a 5 day trip to grand rapids, to play a gig and primarily to watch my dear friend get married. Prior to that trip I was really sick. Before that I was adjusting to a new job. So, I guess there has been more than one distraction at work here. But now that I'm back in NYC, feeling better, adjusted to the job, adjusted to the less-intense version of the relationship that caused me so much grief during this latter half of winter... I have the feeling of being at a crossroads once again. Time to see what can be done. Time to think and to do. And what more appropriate, hopeful, euphoric sounding song (pay no mind to its lyrics) to come onto my cd player as I write this but "Let Down" on OK Computer by Radiohead. With that, I am ready to take on this day!

True Dilligence

2005-01-07T13:54:00.000-08:00

I'm having a lucid moment; let me take advantage of it. I've just been sitting at my piano (Yamaha keyboard, that is) playing the past 15 minutes or so - first, music that I have to learn because I'm songleading/accompanying at a church service this Sunday; secondly, songs of my own - songs that can always use more practice on the keys. I didn't sing along with them because my voice is shot. I was up late last night (or was it two nights ago?) yell-singing my heart out on a bridge I just wrote for a new song that's been brewing for a while.

As I was sitting, singing, playing, and then just playing, I was reminded that I need to start being dilligent again. Since the holidays, since my gig at the bitter end, I've been "taking it easy" on the music stuff. I haven't made any efforts to line up another gig. The going-to-one-open-mike-a-week thing petered out months ago. I rarely get to Caffe Vivaldi's anymore b/c now I have a steady volunteer committment on Monday nights.

Incidentally, I don't mind that I haven't gotten back to that place. It's terrific - a great atmosphere; fun - like I've said before. But there are other avenues to be pursued at the juncture. My music may be known by only a few dozen (a liberal estimate) people in NYC, but my experience is not limited to what I have accomplished here. I have an EP now - the EP I was talking about doing for a year and a half. I should be telling people about it. I should be pressing lots of copies and making it available for people who want to buy it.

I don't think I was ever dilligent. In the whole time that I've been "pursuing music" full-time - that is, since graduating college in 2002 - I have never totally thrown myself into this thing. I've talked about doing it; I've had intentions to do it; I know what it would mean to do it. Pursuing the music dream with abandon isn't merely having decided to move to New York. In fact, the NYC move was primarily motivated by a reason other than music. What dillengence would really look like would be me developing and honing every aspect of my singer-songwriter identity to the extent at which no more could be done without outside help, likefinally landing a label or a manager. For instance, let's say I really did revamp my website, press 500 copies of my EP, set up the website so people could buy CDs online, took my simple press kit and EP and sent it or gave it out to every potential interesting place to gig in New York. What if I set up a tour in Michigan and rented a car for a week, and then just barrelled through and played a ton of places, built up my following, built a buzz, and then, after all that was done.... THEN I sat down for a break and a little bit of a wait. but not too long of one, because chances are if I extended myself that much, things would happen. Maybe not something as big and dramatic as a major record label deal, but little opportunities would keep emerging. And -besides "little emerging opportunities" - what am I talking about here anyway, gremlins? - the point is I would be doing some really constructive things. I would be doing constructively. I would be DOING my music. Ahh!! What an amazing prospect!

I have not, ever, been truly dilligent in this aspect of my life - the aspect that I claim as my vocation. hey, if I were to give dilligence a go, a real shot for the first time in my life, and it didn't all hang together or it totally flopped, wouldn't that be an amazing sign? God saying, "I have other plans for you. Not this." The clarity provided with a fizzling failure would be a sharp gift - dilligence leading to failure transformed into catalyst towards true calling.
So that, or dilligence leading to a full-time career as singer-songwriter (no longer needing the cheesy phrase, "pursuing music")
A win-win situation.

Debut at The Bitter End

2004-12-26T19:11:00.000-08:00

So an entire week and Christmas 2004 have passed since my gig at the Bitter End, but with as busy as the past few days have been... this is how it had to be.

The show went great! Lots of people came. I was hoping that 20 people would come to see me. 30 was the in-my-dreams figure. Thirty-one was the actual number. Friends and friends of friends brought friends of their own, and rounded out the crowd. I really appreciated the show of support.

I played 5 songs: fortune-teller; another again; shiver (it began snowing just as I was starting to play that song - happy accident); the prince, and living in fantasy. I definitely went over my allotted 15 minutes, but it was with the allowance of Larry, who runs the whole show.

Leading up to the show I'd mad rushed to put together the album I've been talking about for a year and a half now: the living in fantasy ep. I've had the recordings for the album for months. Now that I have a computer, I was able to burn copies/print covers/assemble the cds all in my own room. It's a simple package - it had to be - but the important thing is that it finally exists! And now since last Sunday night, 17 copies of it are scattered around the city of New York. Next up is to make it available to order over the internet Which reminds me, I have to renew my domain name!!

December day

2004-12-15T15:17:00.000-08:00

I don't have to go to my job today, and that leaves for a lot of contemplation time.
Here I am, living in New York City. One of my girlhood goals fulfilled. My debut at the Bitter End is this Sunday night. What will come of it? I don't know. Nothing's really "happened" yet with the music career in NYC. If the gig turns ouut to be inconsequential, I'll be a little depressed. I realize, though, that my success here in that area depends on a mix of factors, and though luck is one, greater parts are hard work and determination (holy cow, cliche).

But as I sit around here in my apartment today, sort of straightening things up, vegging, and watching a DVD, I start to wonder if I can somehow, by my lifestyle, force a greater work ethic and sense of motivation. What I fantasize about doing sometimes is just hitting the road and playing gigs anywhere I have a personal connection, and there are a few places on that list: Grand Rapids (of course), Minneapolis, south-central Minnesota, rural coastal Washington state :), western Wisconsin, Nashville, Phoenix, parts of Chicago. Oh, but I don't have a car anymore, that's right. And I don't have money to do it. Well, not unless I were to expend my savings...

Just thinking aloud here. Life has been full and busy lately. Funny how one empty day off can get me thinking I need change. I can be very shortsighted sometimes.

But touring would be so awesome. I'll still dream about that.

Death to stagnancy!

2004-11-22T19:29:00.000-08:00

I'm gotten to be rather unmotivated in terms of my own mic attendance, even for the one at Caffe Vivaldi which I've been figuring throughout this time is/will be my ticket to getting a really nice gig - that is, if I ever get invited to the once-a-month open-mic invitational. Though now that it's midway through November and I do have a gig lined up for December that I want everyone to come to, what's the point of aligning myself properly to get asked to the December invitational at Vivaldi ("aligning" myself means I would go to the open mic this week and next week, for Michael the host to remember and consider me for the event)? Wouldn't adding a gig right before another, very important one be the scheduling equivalent of shooting myself in the foot? Okay, and/or maybe I am just lazy and cheap (it seems like I've already tried every special drink an the Vivaldi menu - and $7 every time really adds up!).

So here I am, sitting at home, and Vivaldi open mic begins in less than an hour and is at least a 35-minute walk-and-subway trek from here. Um, yes, it looks like I won't be going. This poses a particular obstacle/opportunity: to make valuable use of my evening even though I've chosen not to get myself out on the scene. There seems only one equally productive alternative: work on writing tonight - maybe even finish a song! Now THAT would be a thrill.

Here's the good news: I've got a new contact. This past weekend in Philly I met the extended family of one of my housemates, including her uncle and aunt who are actors here in the city. I got the chance to play a song for the whole crew (after a scrumptious early Thanksgiving dinner), and when I had finished playing - the song was Fortune-teller - her New York aunt said, "Do you have a demo? If you could get it to me I could give it to my friend. He's VP of artist development at RCA Records." Well, okay! I think I could scrounge up my demo!

Now, I've had record label contacts in the past - the opportunity to be heard by friends of friends who work for Aware, Interscope, Sparrow - and none of them have ever panned out. So I'm not getting my hopes too high. But, I am buoyant about it, because there's always a chance that something significant could come of it - a record deal, fame, financial security, artistic fulfillment, corruption, cynicism, ruin - everything I could hope for or dread. And that's exciting, either way. I'm not kidding. Because even if signing to a label turned out to be a troubled path, it seeems to me the movement of itself would be good. I mean, I would begin with one set of circumstances, a lot would change, and I would end with another set. So much learning and growth to that! And things wouldn't be stagnant. Death to stagnancy!

Not much

2004-11-18T14:02:00.000-08:00

-Not much to report. I'm thinking about how I'm going to do the EP thing. I'm also thinking about songwriting, and how I've written lots of bits of things since moving but seem to lack the discipline to complete anything. And the rare song I do complete doesn't seem worthwhile. Tonight I revisited that "rare, completed song" that I penned a couple weeks ago, inspired by a fluffy work crush. And I'm thisclose to polishing a nice chord progression for one I began in September that still needs much better lyrics (it's got primarily filler" right now). Okay, then. But I'm glad to have gotten something accomplished, muscially speaking. When it's been too long, I begin to doubt.

Preparing for my first NYC gig

2004-11-07T22:25:00.000-08:00

Alright, now this could be good.
A couple weekends ago I had an audition (see 10/24 post). Well, I heard back from Larry Oakes, and I made the cut for the New York Singer/Songwriter Sessions. On December 19, at 7:45 at the Bitter End, I will be performing a 15-minute set.
15 minutes isn't much. But you have to start somewhere. And the more people I can get to come to this event, the more likelihood there will be for a repeat performance and exposure to a wider audience.
I've been thinking about how I will promote this thing and what I would like to have with me on the night of the performance. First, items to have with me (and these will require some prep):

-> a sellable demo - or EP - of more recently written and recorded songs. At this point I believe even a "homemade" looking product is better than no product.
-> an email list clipboard
- > business cards or fliers with my website address

Now, as for publicity...
Emails:
One to my housemates
One to my email list that includes Grand Rapids contacts
One directed just to NY-based contacts

Announcements:
-> When playing at Caffe Vivaldi and other open mikes, announce the gig and (closer to the time of the event) have fliers with me to pass to people so they don't have to write down the details (because they probably won't).

-> Tell my supervisors and co-workers at work and also post a flier up on the bulletin board near the break room. Talk it up a lot about a week and a half in advance (being still subtle enough not to risk causing annoyance!).

-> Tell fellowship group (if I'm in one by then).

This is just a start. More brainstorming to come.

Pondering the day job

2004-10-27T22:32:00.000-07:00

When I moved to New York almost two months ago, I got an easy little sales associate job at a nice national-chain home furnishings store. The pay was Not good but I figured I'd get something to replace it or add to it - something that would bring in the "real bucks" - pretty soon after that. Well, in this time I have not taken on another job, nor have I very aggressively pursued it. And having discovered yesterday that after 60 days of 30 hours a week at this job, I'll get medical and dental insurance, I'm starting to think about settling in for a while. Though the pay is, as I said, not good, the management at my job is great - very agreeable and flexible - my co-workers are cool; the environment is rarely stifling, often above-tolerable, and sometimes even very pleasant (depending on the day, the customers, and my mood).

Somehow the idea of health benefits, combined with the knowledge of how this job had complemented my music-interests schedule so far, is hugely comforting to me. What have I to lose to just put in the time and hours to get those benefits, hang on to this job as long as it allows me to scrape by financially, and then be able to keep working on the music stuff as I have been up to this point? And I can always take on an additional little something-or-other job to fill 15 hours a week if I'm feeling the crunch. OR, Even Better: I can work on getting out a little EP to sell at gigs. I was going to release an EP last summer. I held off on it because of the move and because I was given some advice to just focus on a demo and promo kit and not bother with marketing something directly to the public. The person who gave me that advice is pretty much out of the picture now, and I need to make some decisions again from an independent-musician standpoint.

So, I think I choose the $8/hour easy job that gives me time and energy to spare, and with that extra time and energy I'll work on securing the gigs and getting some product together to sell!

another night at Caffe Vivaldi

2004-10-25T22:46:00.000-07:00

Tonight I visted a specific open mike night for the fourth time - at Caffe Vivaldi in Greenwich Village. I've loved the atmosphere there, with good low lighting, a good listening crowd, and an entertaining host, Michael Karp... and I've felt energized by the feedback I've received there when I play. Tonight seemed to drag like past nights haven't, however... the place was pretty full up and so there wasn't room to sit and save seats for the friends who would be coming to see me. I was also 22nd on the sign-up list - kind of a drag to wait out the evening. But, I'm still glad I went, and tried out a new song, and I'm ever thankful for the friends who somehow see it as a fun thing to come out across town or on hour-long train commutes to share in evenings structured around my playing two songs at a bar on its open mike night.

One degree of seperation

2004-10-24T01:57:00.000-07:00

I never would have imagined that at some point in my life there would be only one degree of separation between myself and the band Foreigner, the arena rock band of the 70s/80s which churned out such hits as "Hot-Blooded," "Double Vision" and the classic power ballad "I Want to Know What Love Is (...I want you to show me...)"

But now I've met Larry Oakes, who played keyboards for the legendary Foreigner and now, four years into the new millenium, runs the singer-songwriter showcase he founded called the NY Songwriter Sessions.

The NY Songwriter Sessions are these nights set aside at a couple different well-established NYC music clubs - The Bitter End in Greenwich Village and CBGB's in the East Village - where new artists can showcase for 15 minutes each. It's like a couple steps up from an open mike night, but it's better than that because number one you have to audition to get there, and two, you get to play at cool, well-known places (Bitter End and CBGB's both) that perhaps you wouldn't otherwise have had a crack at. Depending on how many people you can bring in to see you play, it can also be a paying gig (wow! I was starting to forget that there was a point in my life when I sometimes got paid to perform).

Anyway, an in-the-nick-of-time thing took place. Late Friday night, I learned that auditions for the Sessions would be taking place on Saturday afternoon - the very next day. Furthermore, though I was scheduled from 1 p.m. to 9 p.m. on Saturday at my place of emplyoment, I called in on Saturday morning and requested a long lunch break to be able to do this thing (though I would have gone into work and skipped the audition if I hadn't been given permission). And what would you know, my manager actually changed the schedule and permitted me to go! So I'm feeling a hand of providence on the whole experience, before even getting to the audition.

Is this story getting too long or what? So I went, guitar in grip, because the place doesn't have a piano, and hauling my keyboard around New York is an experience I'm attempting to hold off on as long as possible. I got there and was 18th to sign up. I played my Guitar Song for Larry and the other auditionees still remaining after 17 others had shown their skills (or their enthusiasm, at least) on one original song apiece. When I left, I went over and shook Larry's hand and he said, "I'll give you a call before the end of the week." Well, it's not the bag yet, but he had said earlier, to the whole group, that he would be giving a call by the end of the week to those who would be invited to perform at the Sessions. So, I'm taking that parting comment as a bright sign!

Incidentally, I am getting into this artist-identity thing. I already stay up late nights and sleep in on mornings, I already have a low-paying, customer-service oriented day job, and I already have the inclination sometimes to just sit at my piano and play through a new song rather than say, shower and get ready for the day or, wash my whites so I have clean socks to wear. Being an artist is so much fun!

one degree of seperation...
Until later... Godspeed.

An afternoon off and pasta for dinner... ahh!

2004-10-13T17:21:00.000-07:00

I am feeling so mellow right now, as I went to work early today and got out at three, was able to come back and get a couple things done, take a nap, make food for dinner (amazing), and now I can sit here and plunk these keys while listening to the Garden State soundtrack. Currently playing is the song that was playing during the big getting-high scene. Anyone remember that? I'm rarely tempted by drugs but somehow that scene had me a little interested in a mind-bending experience. Not to worry, however... I'll stay clean. (You, my still non-existent readership... don't worry. :)

Tomorrow I'm headed to an open mike in Brooklyn. The moderate goal I've so far set for myself regarding the music career in NY is to play at least one open mic per week. I've already "broken" that resolution but getting back on the wagon is essential. No regrets, just get out there when you can! Hopefully joining me will be a new friend I made a week and a half ago, who is also a singer-songwriter and just recently moved to the city.

Okay, so here's the exciting thing coming up in a week. I'm going to a Sam Phillips concert at Carnegie Hall. For people who don't know Sam Phillips, she used to be a CCM artist under the name "Leslie Phillips." Quite a while ago she left CCM, having some major issues with it, in regards to artistic restrictions and image restrictions, and some ideological differences (imagine that). She's a Christian, and she talks about her faith in her music, just not in the neat, tidy way in which a lot of CCM industry children are kind of forced to do in order to fill the market niche.
(My feelings about CCM belong in another blog at another time. It's too big to address within a tangent.)

SO, getting back on topic... a couple weeks ago I emailed a concert-promoter mentor-friend of mine who booked a Sam Phillips concert this fall, because I was trying to get contact info for someone at Nonesuch Records, which is Sam's record label home and also home to the likes of Wilco, Emmylou Harris, k.d. lang, and a variety of other artists in lots of different genres - world beat, jazz, classical, folk rock, etc. It is a goal of mine to get listened to by Nonesuch, because from what I've read and seen, I love the way they operate and I feel like I would have a chance for a home there, as my music is uncategorizable to a certain extent. ohhh, big dreams of record labels... (I make my exposition fairly nonchalant but if anything were to come of this story I'm in the middle of telling, I would be cautiously perched on cloud nine).

The mentor-friend did more for me than I expected. He not only gave me the email address of his contact at Nonesuch; he reminded me that I have met Sam Phillip's manager and gave me that email address.

That's right; when I did a songwriting semester program at Martha's Vineyard three years ago, I met Dan Russell, Sam's manager, who at the time was busy promoting an up-and-coming goth emo-ish rock group signed to Virgn Records: The Black Rebel Motorcycle Club. Dan is cool! Armed with this connection, I emailed Dan to reintroduce myself and ask him if he'd be willing to listen to my demo. After a series of emails back and forth, I again got more than I expected: the encouragement to attend Sam's show at Carnegie Hall on October 19, and the offer of aftershow passes to be able to meet up with Dan as well as Tom Willett, his old friend and one of my instructors from the program at Martha's Vineyard, whom I haven't seen since Fall 2001.
Oh, and Dan will listen to my demo. That's the first thing he said in our email exchange.

So, getting to see Sam in concert at Carnegie and meet up with these guys is definitely to be a highlight for my month. Now, I don't know what Dan is busying himself with these days. This girl (I!) could definitely benefit from some managerial guidance, particularly from someone who has been in the business as long as he (who, in their early days, served as U2's financial manager).

We'll see what comes of it! Gotta get my best recordings together on a cd, gotta get something promo-kittish together that projects some professionalism. I'll definitely be checking back in after October 19, if not earlier.

Wise advice... hone in on a topic

2004-09-30T22:31:00.000-07:00

The temptation with this blog may not be to spill my secrets, I'm now realizing (I have a paper journal for that), but rather perhaps to overextend myself and try to talk about too many things, get off on too many tangents. Why am I writing though, really? Besides or beyond my own personal outlet? I could always type away on Word documents that no one ever saw, so why am I writing in a public domain? I need to provide something useful, and I'd like it too be something more than a way for some web-surfing acquaintances to satisfy their free-floating curiousity. Now, I'm not knocking blogs that a) provide their writers with an outlet of expression and b) provide readers with some curiousity satisfied. I like the idea that we humans are curious sometimes about even the mundane aspects of other human's lives. It's a testament to our basic need to connect. BUT, that said....
I possess the dangerous tendency to wax on about things I like or do not like. I have a tendency towards wistfulness. I border on obsessivesness about some things, because I analyze them so much to myself and to others that I start to see them as extensions of me.... okay, maybe it's not quite as bad as I'm making it sound. But if I don't place some parameters on this deal, it could get to be a big, mess of stream-of-consciousness stewing-in-my-own-juices about this or that or whatever is heavy on my mind a particular day, to the point of obsession or narcissism. And it will be annoying to read. let's not have that, shall we?
okay, I'll do my best. I still haven't told anyone about this site. but now I'm picking a topic, a specific topic, that will be my focus. now I have a reason that you may want to send a couple minutes in front of this webpage occasionally, to glean something that could be of interest or value to you:
I am going to record the experience of trying to pursue a career as a singer-songwriter.
Now, before you stop reading: I promise, I'll try to make it interesting, even when there are boring days and I'll have to do a little spin on them in order to make them more readable.
And my tendencies to stew and get off on tangents are bound to show up here and there in the narrative. But starting now, this blogger has a purpose. thanks for reading, nonexistent-as-of-yet-Readers. love, sep10ber

I didn't know...

2004-09-28T21:13:00.000-07:00

i didn't really know how easy it was to create one's own blog. I didn't realize it was easy AND free until my friend abitdistractedtnl set one up just a few minutes ago right across the room from me, and she didn't even have to leave the room. it was that simple. So now I find I'm writing... adding to the sea of often useless and often entertaining information floating out there in cyberspace.
I didn't ever PURSUE maintaining my own blogsite because I always figured I would slip up and end up writing about things too personal, overexposing my soul, etc, and I tried doing a "journal" once on my business website and ended up doing just that. i took the entry down a day later. The difference with this is that my first and last names do not make up the bulk of the URL, as is the case with my business site.
It may be an interesting exercise just to see how MUCH I can reveal in my blog without really revealing anything at all. An exercise in exhibitionistic restraint that simultaneously satisfies my slightly exhibitionistic tendencies. Hmm. Good night for now.